Somebody Call a Doctor.

I hope you're sitting down for this, because it's going to come as quite a shock. Not only has the Farm blog been somewhat neglected over the past week, but so has the Farm. The even more shocking part is the reason for the neglect: I have been working. Like crazy. See? I told you to sit down.

Well anyway, I went to the Farm this morning to do a closer inspection of things, and folks, it was not pretty. The zucchini plants have developed an unfortunate case of powdery mildew:



















And not to be outdone by the fungus, squash borers have invaded the stems. I know it mostly looks disgusting in there, but see where it's kind of orange and looks a bit like sawdust? That is where some ginormous moths laid their eggs, which then bored into the stems and now gross grub-looking caterpillars are growing inside and making a mess of things. Rather than gross you out with the details, here's another link you can click on to get a closer look if you're not in the middle of eating. Though I will point out that the "surgery" I need to do on the other plants is kind of like my two dreams, combined into one thing. Surgery! On the farm! It's going to be so much better than Wii surgery, I can't even tell you...



















The powdery mildew, as it turns out, is not that big of a deal for the plants. It mostly slows down their growth, which is not a problem around the Farm because N's taste for zucchini can't keep pace with the plants. What's the solution to preventing it? Surprise, surprise. Spacing, people. Spacing. Mildew doesn't like airflow and direct sunlight.

However, the squash borer situation is more serious, and that plant was in rough shape. Not to mention the fact that it had completely plugged up the entrance to the farm. So if you'll all join me in a moment of silence (see how I placed my flipflop in there for scale?)...



Pour one for the homie.







And now, a farmer can get into her farm without risking death or muscle injury.




















That's not the end of the diseases. The beans, as you can see here, are in rough shape. I'm pretty sure the holes are from flea beetles that used to feed on the unstaked pea plants (do not follow directions on the seed packets re: not staking!), and moved once the peas were staked and later pulled because of the heat. And after a bit of google research, I can tell you that rusty-looking stuff is just that. Bean rust. Yet another fungus.



















At this point in the summer, and since the beans are still making beans, I'm going to leave it untreated. Next time I have a farm, though, I'll have to keep a closer eye on things.


Farm Vitals
Yesterday's high: 79F
Yesterday's low: 57F
Warnings: We're in a drought, and the average first frost is exactly one month away. *Ahem* if you're a tomato plant, especially one with yellow fruit, please get your fruit in gear and ripen stat.
Mood of the farm: Sickly, much like its farmer.
Reason to consider a new career: Farmer has been earning perfect 10s, except for the occasional dozing-off-deduction, watching Olympic gymnastics, which if you've watched at all, have heard Elfie Schlagel et al explain four million times is no longer possible. If I hear them explain the A and B score one more time, I'm going to kill someone, and I hear it's real hard to get access to farmland from prison.