Somebody Call a Doctor.

I hope you're sitting down for this, because it's going to come as quite a shock. Not only has the Farm blog been somewhat neglected over the past week, but so has the Farm. The even more shocking part is the reason for the neglect: I have been working. Like crazy. See? I told you to sit down.

Well anyway, I went to the Farm this morning to do a closer inspection of things, and folks, it was not pretty. The zucchini plants have developed an unfortunate case of powdery mildew:



















And not to be outdone by the fungus, squash borers have invaded the stems. I know it mostly looks disgusting in there, but see where it's kind of orange and looks a bit like sawdust? That is where some ginormous moths laid their eggs, which then bored into the stems and now gross grub-looking caterpillars are growing inside and making a mess of things. Rather than gross you out with the details, here's another link you can click on to get a closer look if you're not in the middle of eating. Though I will point out that the "surgery" I need to do on the other plants is kind of like my two dreams, combined into one thing. Surgery! On the farm! It's going to be so much better than Wii surgery, I can't even tell you...



















The powdery mildew, as it turns out, is not that big of a deal for the plants. It mostly slows down their growth, which is not a problem around the Farm because N's taste for zucchini can't keep pace with the plants. What's the solution to preventing it? Surprise, surprise. Spacing, people. Spacing. Mildew doesn't like airflow and direct sunlight.

However, the squash borer situation is more serious, and that plant was in rough shape. Not to mention the fact that it had completely plugged up the entrance to the farm. So if you'll all join me in a moment of silence (see how I placed my flipflop in there for scale?)...



Pour one for the homie.







And now, a farmer can get into her farm without risking death or muscle injury.




















That's not the end of the diseases. The beans, as you can see here, are in rough shape. I'm pretty sure the holes are from flea beetles that used to feed on the unstaked pea plants (do not follow directions on the seed packets re: not staking!), and moved once the peas were staked and later pulled because of the heat. And after a bit of google research, I can tell you that rusty-looking stuff is just that. Bean rust. Yet another fungus.



















At this point in the summer, and since the beans are still making beans, I'm going to leave it untreated. Next time I have a farm, though, I'll have to keep a closer eye on things.


Farm Vitals
Yesterday's high: 79F
Yesterday's low: 57F
Warnings: We're in a drought, and the average first frost is exactly one month away. *Ahem* if you're a tomato plant, especially one with yellow fruit, please get your fruit in gear and ripen stat.
Mood of the farm: Sickly, much like its farmer.
Reason to consider a new career: Farmer has been earning perfect 10s, except for the occasional dozing-off-deduction, watching Olympic gymnastics, which if you've watched at all, have heard Elfie Schlagel et al explain four million times is no longer possible. If I hear them explain the A and B score one more time, I'm going to kill someone, and I hear it's real hard to get access to farmland from prison.

Yellow Striped Cucumber Beetles Relive the 70s

Well, yesterday I was on the farm to check on the yellow striped cucumber beetles. I haven't really worried about them much because we're certainly not short on cucumbers or zucchini (since N is the only one that eats a lot of zucchini, and she can't keep up with what we're growing as it is). But I was curious. The collective wisdom of the internets say it's time to do something about these guys once you get five on a single plant. So imagine my surprise when I look into the following flower. What's that you say? There's only five in there? Nope. Look closer. Those are all *ahem* pairs of yellow striped cucumber beetles, apparently making more friends to hang out with. Great. Maybe it's good that the first average frost around here is September 15th...



















In entertaining news, here's a little trick of nature that resulted from all the feeding the cucumber beetles have done on the zucchini leaves. A flower grew right through one of the holes!


















And finally, the carrots are basically spaced out, and as you can see from the ones that I thinned, growing if not with gusto, then at least slowly but surely.

























Stay tuned tomorrow afternoon for a very first and extremely anticipated harvest! And of course, MiniChuck's Eye View of the Farm in the morning.


Farm Vitals
Yesterday's high: 83F
Yesterday's low: 68F
Warnings: Excited farmer coming to the farmer tomorrow!
Mood of the farm: Working up its patience for the farmer's undoubted exuberance tomorrow.
Reason to consider a new career: all this exuberance...

Green Thumb Sunday

Green Thumb Sunday: Don't Listen If It Says Not to Stake Your Wando Peas Edition






Without Staking:


With Staking:




Join

Gardeners, Plant and Nature lovers can join in every Sunday, visit As the Garden Grows for more information.

Flowers on the Farm. And Bees, Too.

[You know you're becoming a farmer when you start every blog post with the word "Well" that sounds like you just leaned back in your chair on the porch, stretched your arms out, cracked your knuckles, then rested your hands behind your head, and settled in for a good tale. Oh, did I mention you'd also look like a 40 year old man in overalls, chewing on a bit of straw? Farming is a life-changer...]

Well, life on the farm has had its ups and downs lately, due primarily to wildlife. Though I'm happy to say for the moment that the cayenne pepper seems to be working. On the rabbits, and also on the yellow-striped cucumber beetles. With a respite from so much nibbling, the lettuce is growing back, and nearly everything has flowers or blooms. The tomato plants (which ended up totaling 9 (9!!)) each have more than a dozen flowers on them now, so I think we're going to be swimming in tomatoes. Maybe I'll start my own farmers(s') market stand if times get desperate.

After following some of the farm blogs of the internets, I was beginning to fear there would be many flowers and nothing to pollinate them since the only things flying around my farm were mosquitoes. Luckily, and as usual, my idea of timing was a little earlier than mother nature's. When the blossoms swelled until they were about to burst, but just before they opened, the pollinators heard/sniffed the bat signal. Several kinds of bees and many wasps have been checking out the garden, which is good news for plants, farmers, and consumers (I know it takes a shift to think of wasps as good news--see what I mean about the changes involved with being a farmer??), but terrible news for Rosa, who I saw this morning getting her epi-pen refilled at the pharmacy.

I have big plans for a portion of the farm that needs the revise-and-resubmit treatment, but this post is long already... More tomorrow.

Here are the beans for a bit of color to your morning.























Farm Vitals
Yesterday's high: 76F
Yesterday's low: 51F
Warnings: Fireworks alert
Mood of the farm: buzzing with patriotism
Reason to consider a new career: bee fears and other various ridiculousnesses

Would You Like Cayenne Pepper With That Salad?

After much internet research and contemplation of all varieties of urine (no really) to keep the rabbits out, I've settled on the following practices:
1) copious amounts of cayenne pepper on any plant that looks delicious
2) garlic powder around the perimeter of the farm
3) encouraging Maisy and Rosa to pee anywhere near the farm as often as possible
4) plugging up any holes in the fence that seem inviting
5) this weekend, extending the fence by burying it and also making it taller

Here's the cayenne pepper in action:



During my morning visit to the farm, Maisy and I spied a chipmunk in the farm, which has led to the additional need for wire mesh to go over the fence as well. Who knew farming would be as much about growing things as it is keeping other things from growing?

In other news during the hiatus, this shiny piece of metal combined with a pissed off delivery guy and my foot resulted in four stitches and tetanus shot. I'm on the mend now, though.



Farm Vitals
Yesterday's high: 89F
Yesterday's low: 61F
Warnings: Wildlife alert!
Mood of the farm: spicy
Reason to consider a new career: dealing with animal problems is annoying

Sadness and Mourning on the Farm

Farmer hates rabbits.
Farmer hates woodchucks.
Taking tomorrow to compose attack plan.
Farm blog observing day of silence in honor of lettuce.
About five salad bowls were ready for harvest, and plenty more was growing.

Animals Abound

1. Cute while on this side of the fence. (Nice rock sculpture, eh?)
2. There's been a lot of mating going on where the farm is concerned. Here's the thing. For centuries, farmers have appreciated the need of all species to shag. It's natural, and farmers are all about nature. But the real question is this: must they nibble on the zucchini and cucumber leaves while going about their business?

On a more serious note--does anyone know what these are? Are they, as I fear, the dreaded striped cucumber beetles? And if so, does anyone have any ideas about what to do about them while there are only a few? I'm thinking pull them off by hand and hope to keep the numbers small. Thoughts?

3. Oh yeah. Also, here's how awesome the farm looks! Well, except for that crappy part on the right front side. Science-in-action post coming soon in explanation.

Farm Vitals
Yesterday's high: 79F
Yesterday's low: 61F
Warnings: Another great day for growing.
Mood of the farm: rolling its collective eye at all the mating ("kids these days!")
Fun fact of the day: Technically speaking, the only things growing in the garden that aren't fruits (besides the herbs) are spinach, lettuce, carrots, and onions. No really. Think back to 5th grade science.

Farmer Victory!

It was not the squirrel, Nutz4Nuts, who had a taste for cilantro.

It was this character:












And this one fat one that I suspect ate most of the leaves:



















And two others, just like them. At least, that's how many I've found so far. This farmer was looking for the beasts during the day, when the real trick was to sleuth around at night.

Using my Farmer Resources (aka a link provided by N to the U of MN Extension Service), I believe these are cutworms. The U's picture looks suspiciously like my cilantro-scarfers.















Now if I could only figure out what the problem is with the patio tomato plants (flea beetles??), the pest problems might be under control for one minute. Tentative Theory on the Farm: growing plants outside is better than pretending your screened in patio is a farm.

Who ate the cilantro??

I should be able to find it, given how much it's eaten, but so far, mystery worm/bug eludes me.
What does not elude me, however, is MiniChuck! I sleuthed out it's home, and will try to get photos tomorrow. If I don't post for a while, check the MiniChuck hole...

Farm Vitals
Yesterday's high: 74F
Yesterday's low: 55F
Warnings: Flood watch
Mood of the farm: weedy
Reason to consider a new career: farmer is WAY outnumbered by the pests...

Danger on the Farm

While working on a surprise project for H&N yesterday, I uncovered a massive colony of fire ants. Maisy thought it would be a good idea to check into them by taking a good sniff. Much sneezing ensued, and I think she got them all out of her nose. However, lesson not learned. She went right back for more... And promptly got yelled at. Turns out, there's even doggie time out on the farm.

Here's a little idea of what I found. For perspective, this piece of concrete is about 4 feet x 2 feet.

Projects on the Farm

The Good
Quite a few things have been happening on the farm in the last few days. More things are sprouting (spinach, look far right), first and foremost, which is a nice little boost of confidence for this farmer. Also, the mint apple plant seems to have risen from the almost-dead for good, and after removing some of the almost-frost-nipped leaves, looks pretty good!


The Bad
The woodchuck (aka MiniChuck), on the other hand, has been finding new and inventive ways to bring trials to the life of the farmer. As if the hissing and staring down wasn't enough! Now, MiniChuck has decided to sample the watermelon plants. According to MiniChuck, three plants, three snacks:








The Ugly
Now, let's all get on the same page here for a minute. I know this "fence" isn't going to win any awards anytime soon. Although, I did take a "green approach" by using some of the rocks I found while prepping the area to block some of the gaps in the fencing. *ahem* However, if I'm really lucky, it might just keep MiniChuck from snacking on the leaves. And, more importantly, snacking on the farmer.














(as usual, click for a bigger picture...)








Farm Vitals
Yesterday's high: 72F
Yesterday's low: 53F
Warnings: None. It's finally sunny!
Mood of the farm: feeling safe and secure with the new fencing
Reason to consider a new career: let's just say my fencing skills leave something to be desired...

Scary Things

Two things on the farm have instilled fear in this farmer.











1.) Marmota monax. Has hastened the need for installing the chicken wire fencing this weekend by: staring down the farmer, hissing at the farmer. 'Nuff said.










2.) A worm, unknown species. Potentially a baby hornworm. Eating a cherry tomato plant, slowly but surely. Luckily, I spoke to a gardening expert (E. Hart, for those of you who are jealous), who suggested spraying the tomato plant with a homemade mixture of mashed up garlic and cayenne pepper in water. Of course, this is on tap for tomorrow.

Right now, due to unseasonably cool temperatures, cloudy skies, a long morning of doggie daycare interviewing, and some pressing pbfilter work, Maisy, the unknown worm (in ziplock bag), and I are hard at work sleeping, crawling, and data processing, respectively.

Farm Vitals
Yesterday's high: 69F
Yesterday's low: 43F
Watches: potential thunderstorm
Mood of the farm: secretive!
Reason to consider a new career: Farmer couldn't wait to know what was happening underground and was reduced to uncovering a Wando pea seed. Verdict: there's a tiny root! Other verdict: Farmer needs to grow some patience, stat.